What did your life look like ten years ago? Jillian reflects on her life in 2010 and how one of the worst years of her life became the catalyst for change and growth. 

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Everyone loves the beauty of a growing crop or ripening harvest, but the preparation of the land and plowing of the field isn’t very glamorous. Ten years ago Jillian was acutely aware of the truth that “The best-laid schemes of mice and men go often awry” (Robert Burns, To a Mouse). Like a newly plowed field, her plans had been crushed under the weight of the dark and dirty realities of life. In 2020, most of us can relate to those feelings. 

Jillian was facing a crisis of faith, a struggling marriage, and her own crumbling mental health. She entrusted her plan for care to her husband and close friend who checked her into a treatment center where she would receive the support she needed at the time. While the mental health diagnosis was a hard pill to swallow she was also free to be truthful, honest, and to shed the expectations of others as she looked forward. 

One of the most difficult times of grief and pain inspired new ambition, motivation, and passion. It was her diagnosis that helped her develop a writing habit. It was the marital struggles that spurred her and Adam to do the work needed to improve their relationship. She knew she needed to be prepared in case her mental wellness meant taking an extended break from work or seeking therapy or other treatment that motivated her to become financially independent. It is too simplistic to look at someone who seems to have it all together without realizing the steps it has taken for them to get there. 

“The reality is everything that people are envious of has been born out of extreme pain”

Things will get plowed under when something is ending, but you also plow things under at the beginning of something new. 2020 feels like a year when everyone’s plans are being plowed under, but how can we courageously look forward to the next ten years and consider what we might plant and nurture for the upcoming harvest?